By Abimbola Ola

One day, I was coming from Allen Avenue, Ikeja. My friend Sekinat and I took a bus from Allen to Yaba. The conductor was shouting, “Yaba! Yaba! Enter with your ₦700 change o, mi ò ní change o!” We laughed and entered, found seats together, and started gisting.

As more passengers entered, suddenly a strange odour began to ooze out. It was so strong that we almost choked. I quickly covered my nose, and Sekinat did the same. The smell was coming from the person sitting right next to us. By the time we alighted, my friend was almost fainting, while I couldn’t stop laughing. Me, I be giran (I’m rough), but she couldn’t handle it.

That day reminded me how important personal hygiene is. In public spaces like buses, offices, and markets, we are all sharing the same air. A lack of good hygiene doesn’t just affect one person—it makes other people uncomfortable too.

Cleanliness is not only for you but also for the people around you. Bathing regularly, wearing clean clothes, and using deodorant are small habits that make a big difference. Good hygiene shows respect for yourself and for others.

I really wish more people would take their hygiene seriously, because it matters for everyone who shares the public space.

By Abimbola Ola

Sometimes I wonder if Oladele remembers that I gave him the most beautiful gift in September—a child, our child. Yet, instead of gratitude, I get shouts, insults, and threats.

At the slightest misunderstanding, his voice rises: “Fat body, you look like a pig! Are you the only one who just gave birth?” Those words pierce me every time, louder than any slap could ever feel.

I carried life for nine months, I endured pain, I bore sleepless nights, and my body is still healing. But all he sees is flesh that isn’t tight enough, a belly that hasn’t gone down, a body he suddenly despises. He tells me, “By December, if you don’t do something about your look, I will throw your things away.”

The same body he once held with love, the same body that gave him pleasure, the same body that gave him a child—now mocked, shamed, rejected.

I feel torn between two worlds: the joy of being a mother and the pain of being unloved as a wife. I look at my child and see a reason to keep going. I look at myself in the mirror and whisper: “You are more than his words. You are strong. You are worthy.”

I don’t know what tomorrow holds, but I know my scars and stretch marks tell a story of survival, of strength, of life. And no matter what Oladele says, my body is not a curse—it is proof that I am a woman who gave life.

By Abimbola Ola

The silent storm after birth: my journey after postpartum (Depression)

When joy meets darkness: Living through depression  after childbirth the newborn and the mother.

Smiling faces filled the room, carrying gifts, blessings, and warm wishes. Everyone wanted to hold the baby, to take pictures, to celebrate this new life. I smiled too — at least on the outside. But deep inside, I felt a heaviness I could not explain.

I was supposed to be the happiest woman alive being a new mother. A dream fulfilled. Instead, I felt empty, disconnected, and even guilty for not feeling the joy everyone expected me to have. While the world celebrated, I quietly battled an unseen storm called postpartum depression.

The nights were the hardest. The baby would cry, and so would I. My body was exhausted, my mind overwhelmed, and my emotions all over the place. Some days I didn’t even recognise myself. I loved my baby deeply, but there were moments I felt too drained to even hold her close.

It took me a while to admit to myself that something was wrong. It wasn’t laziness. It wasn’t ingratitude. It was depression — the kind nobody talks about loudly enough. Slowly, with support, small steps of self-care, and opening up to someone I trusted, I began to heal.

Welcome to the reality of Postpartum Depression (PPD)!!!

PPD is a significant mood disorder affecting some birthing people and their partners after childbirth, characterised by extreme sadness, hopelessness, anxiety, and loss of interest, lasting more than two weeks and interfering with daily life. Unlike the milder “baby blues,” PPD requires medical treatment, which may include psychotherapy, antidepressant medications, or a combination of both. If you or someone you know experiences severe symptoms for longer than two weeks, or has thoughts of harming themselves or the baby, it is crucial to seek immediate medical help.

Postpartum depression is caused by a combination of factors, including hormonal changes, the stress of sleep deprivation and new parenthood, a history of depression or mental health issues, lack of social support, and other psychosocial stressors such as relationship issues, financial difficulties, or difficult birth experiences. There isn’t one single cause, but rather a combination of biological, psychological, and social factors that can increase a person’s risk for developing PPD.

Science explains that hormonal shifts, such as a rapid drop in estrogen and progesterone levels after childbirth can significantly impact mood and increase the risk of depression.

Others include but not limited to:

Genetics: A family history of depression or other mental health disorders can increase the likelihood of developing PPD.

Previous mental health issues: A history of depression, anxiety, or other mood disorders, including during the current pregnancy, is a strong predictor of postpartum depression.

Psychological & Social Factors

Emotional toll of parenthood: Adjusting to the demands of caring for a newborn can be overwhelming, especially with lack of sleep, which contributes to PPD.

Lack of social support: Inadequate support from a partner, family, or friends can lead to feelings of isolation and increase the risk of depression.

Relationship problems: Marital discord or a poor relationship with a partner can be a significant stressor.

Stressful life events: Other life stressors like financial difficulties, job loss, or a bereavement can trigger PPD in vulnerable individuals.

Past trauma: Experiencing physical or psychological trauma, such as domestic violence, can increase the risk for PPD.

Other Contributing Factors include poor physical health: Complications from childbirth or other physical health problems can also contribute to mood changes and depressive symptoms.

Unmet expectations: Discrepancies between the reality of childbirth and unmet expectations can be a source of stress.

Nutritional deficiencies: Lower levels of certain nutrients, such as zinc and selenium, have been linked to an increased risk of PPD.

Lending a hand

Examples of therapies used for postpartum depression include cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and interpersonal psychotherapy. Antidepressants. Your health care provider may recommend an antidepressant. If you’re breastfeeding, any medicine you take will enter your breast milk.

Also, the 5-5-5 rule is a guideline for what kind of help a postpartum mom needs: five days in bed, five days round the bed — meaning minimal walking around — the next five days around the home. This practice will help you prioritise rest and recovery while gradually increasing activity.

To every new mother reading this, if you’re feeling this way, you are not alone. You are not a bad mother. You are not weak. You are simply human, adjusting to one of the biggest changes in life. And it’s okay to ask for help, to rest, to cry, and to heal at your own pace.